Enough is Enough

There comes a time in everyone's life where they need to let go of the old, and get with the new. Dolls stored in boxes need to be thrown away. Women need to come to grips with the reality that they will never fit into that little black dress they swore at New Years to “lose some weight” and finally “get back into”. Even men have to choose between the 64 bits of the original Nintendo or their Playstation 3. But where it concerns matters of the heart, just how much is it necessary to continue “maintaining ties” with your ex, or cutting them off completely.

This is in fact a continuation from the earlier Mars/ Venus examination of being a 'Friend with your Ex', but this time I am more concerned with the extent to which we still feel the need to remain being courteous.

Of course the situation exists where a break up is mutual, cordial or even respectable, to which courtesy naturally follows, but in situations where it was nasty, painful or even down right heart wrenching, is it really necessary to continue sending 'Happy Birthdays, Congratulations and Life Updates?” Do we have to keep them on our facebook, messenger and calendar updates, or is it best that we maintain a clean break?

In many times I find that people feel some need or sense of duty because it is the “respectable thing to do”, but then are we really helping ourselves or the other party, or merely facilitating a situation that could grow to just be ugly. How many of you have that friend that just can't let go of their ex, so badly that you want to slap them every time you see them say “Oh it's his birthday, I think I should give him a call?” Or worse checking facebook every 5 minutes to see if her status has changed to 'in a relationship'.

In many of these cases one party has or will eventually emotionally terminate the other, at which point the continuous contact becomes unnecessary. Half the time in a break up, we don't want to 'stay friends' or even want to hear from the other party, but it just seems callous if we don’t say it.

Well, Mars thinks that even the women can 'man-up' in this situation. Many times during a break up we are definitely not honest with ourselves or the other person. Do I mean some of us need to start going 'I'm through with you and I never want to hear from you again?' No... but should the other party say 'you hurt me and I never want to hear from you again' A thousand times YES. Sometimes a clean break is not only recommended, it is dire to someone moving on. Let’s be honest, we never really get over someone until we find someone else, and in most cases one person already has. Holding on to the past is just plain unfair to yourself and your partner. Even worse is someone who continues to facilitate a relationship, knowing that they have emotionally terminated the other person. That seems meaner than saying anything at all.

So the cutting up of pictures, deleting of contact info and blocking of calls may not be the act of a lunatic, but merely an act of pure survival.

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Will you still love me, tomorrow?

There was a point in time when I used to believe that having an orgasm was synonymous with falling in love, which probably explains why I love myself so much! But in my semi-brief time here on earth I have come to realize that there is a popular misconception women have about sex; 'that which is said under the influence is most likely the truth'.

Now while this rule can probably be applied to such conditions as being drunk, for a man quite the opposite is experienced during sex. The dangerous thing about ‘pleasure’ or a ‘high’ is that some people might do anything to get it; that includes the famous man-trap that you women so commonly practice when you ask that question during sex…”Do you love me?”

Let me make this completely clear, for that relatively brief moment in time during sexual intercourse, especially if is it’s good, the answer is… OF COURSE WE ARE IN LOVE!!! But like alcohol when the effects wear off we are brought back to reality. The Ugly truth is, when women get dickmatized the effects can be lifelong, when men get pussytized the effects are temporary.

So the conclusion is simple. God gave men two heads and not enough blood to use the both of them. Regardless of the one that falls ‘head-over-heels’ during intercourse, the other one is always there to quickly bring us back to reality in the morning.

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10 Things That Can Make A Pretty Girl Ugly

With the invention of items such as makeup, wonder-bra and extendable body parts, its fairly difficult for a woman to get away with being ugly these days. Even the most hideous creature can look somewhat presentable with the right amount of emoluments to compliment her already ailing canvas. However, whether you are Aphrodite or airbrushed from head to foot, there are still of couple of things that force us men to turn and run the other way. Lets face it, beauty is not only skin deep. So whether you’re looking to beef up your beauty repertoire or just plain keep that sparkle in your eye, there are a few things you always want to bear in mind.

1). A Smile can get you a long way. I’m not saying plaster on a set of joker lips, but even the prettiest face can be scarred by a woman who looks like she's sitting in a meat market. Men like to see a pleasant face, we tend to stray away from miserable ones.

2). Its called being nice, learn how to do it. You’d be surprised how much a “sorry I’m not interested” as opposed to a “nigga please” works in your favor. There’s a big difference between being a lady and being a bitch. No one likes a bitch…period.

3). I’m all for blondes, even dumb ones, but there’s a line of stupidity we just won’t cross. You may be pretty enough to get away with asking me what day of the week we’re in, but if you don’t know the days of the week, we have a problem.

4). At no time should you smell worse than we do. Men have been oblivious to a few things for centuries, and we do it because we prefer to live in a lie. As far as we're concerned, Women don’t fart, burp, dodo or stink! So imagine our horror if we realize you smell like a set of basketball shorts after four quarters. Which brings me to my next 3 points… Women should not

5). Burp

6). Fart or…

7). Do Do. I’m not saying you have to hold it in for the rest of your life, I’m just saying we NEVER want to know about it! A woman’s ass is sacred, and it is never to be desecrated by the thought of you popping a squat.

8). They say sex is a weapon… well good sex is its ammunition. Even the prettiest girl can be kicked to the curb, if she’s not servicing her man right. Look at Halle Berry… her Monster’s Ball performance could have saved her first marriage.

9). Don't be too controlling! The yes dear thing words as a cute wedding advice story, but it real life, it could get your coffee poisoned. Let your man, feel in control, even if he has no clue what he's doing. And...

10). If you remember nothing else, remember this. In the end, a man’s bank account always wins. After all, a man is only as attractive as what he can bring to the table, so when we’re stripped of our amour, chances are we wont go in to battle. If it becomes apparent that you are a burden to my bank account, I’m going to have to save my pennies and get a cheaper companion.

You stick to that script, and I gurantee you, you'll spend less time in the salon and more time int he sack.

EX cuses EX cuses EX cuses!

So I already have to deal with the fact that he's had his fair run in the sack before I did, plus he's already held that very special place in your heart that I'm now learning how to occupy... Now you want us all to go to the movies together and sing cum-by-yah? Hell No!

Mars isn't going to let this one go without a fight. Just imagine how many insecurities a man has to overcome before he can even let go enough to allow his woman to leave the house, now he has to play second fiddle to someone who was previously making a nest where you would like to lay. That's not only a conflict of interest, its a war of ideas!

How is it reasonable for you to ask your new love interest to accept that you are best friends with your ex?

Let's assume that you've given your past relationship its fair trial and have come to grips with the fact that you no longer want to be with this person, then why keep them around, and keep them around so much that you would go as far as to solicit their opinion on the one you're dating? Let's face it, at least one party is ALWAYS still interested, and this is where the whole thing falls apart. You just can't escape bias, and the hope that one day the other will slip, and things will fall back into place. If you had enough chemistry to be together before, then why can't it happen again?

Everyone knows that men and women are built with that internal radar that goes off whenever we detect a 'threat', and with our biological siren going off everytime we hear you say "oh yeah me and guy x were just discussing that..." What room is there for us to grow as a couple? You'd be doomed before you got to the end of the first date.

The verdict is simple, no one is saying you have to be enemies with an Ex, but best friends is a tough enough pill for any new love interest to swallow. Sooner or later you're going to have to ask yourself "do I want to take the plunge into a world of new opportunities, or stay gripping to a sea of lost hope".

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What does she got that I aint got???

Now you got to ask yourself this question, if you were to get hit down by a car, would you want it to be a Benz or a Lada? If you’re going to be put in prison, do you want it to be for a big crime or a little one? Then in the same breath if you know your significant other is leaving you for someone else, do you want it to be for someone better looking or uglier?

Mars seems to have a somewhat different outlook on this entire situation, that I’m sure Venus will have choice words for. Where as the female may be concerned with questions like "is she prettier that me" or "does she have a better body", men seem to really only be concerned with one key issue… "is he better than me in the sack".
This may stem from the fact that the male ego doesn’t permit us to see another male as better looking or better built, but our animalistic instinct would always like to know that you were a better lover.

Lets face it, a mans personal appearance meter can be boosted by things like money, possessions and success, whereas the only real thing a woman can do to enhance her appearance is slap on another quote of makeup, a wonder bra or a tight short skirt. In the end it all comes down to sex.

Think about it ladies, has your new love interest asked you any of the following questions pertaining to your ex boyfriend–

1). Does he have a bigger dick than me?
2). Did he always make you come?
3). What positions did you guys do?
4). What did he do that you didn’t like?
But gentlemen, how many times have you heard
1). Is she prettier than me?
2). Did she have a bigger butt?
3). Does she have bigger breast?
4). Are you still attracted to her?

In the end it’s only wise to remember that no two people are alike in appearance, and attraction is something that doesn’t only stem from a physical perspective. But if you can keep your lady happy in the sack, there will be a lot less breakups and a whole lot more make up sex!

Faith & Love,

Mars

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To The World or To Jamaica??

I made the comment on 'Trivial Pursuit' this morning which in effect suggested that I was dissatisfied with the level of Contribution Usain Bolt was making to his country, in relation to the number of accolades we are so quick to give him. Amongst the many text liners that wanted nothing more than to lay me to rest.. one facebooker had the guts to say they actually agree with me..

Heres what they said and how I responded

FACEBOOK:
I TOTALLY AGREE WIT U THIS MORNING USAIN IS COLLECTING SO IS HIGH TIME HE GIVES SUM BCK, THE ONES MAKING LESS MONEY R GIVING BCK HE NEEDS TO GIVE BCK SUM OF HIS PARTY MONEY

MY RESPONSE:
Although a lot of what I say on the show is in jest, this was one time I was hoping people would see a bit of truth echoing.

We can't ignore the fact that he is a talented young man, and he does scrape a bit off the top to give back... but not in relation to his popularity.

I won't pretend to know the Bible back to back, but I do remember something about giving all that you have. I would never suggest that Bolt hand over every cheque he makes... but scraping the pennies left over to save face doesn't work for me! Jamaica is quick to give him the title of 'Honorable' and not recognize that with great power comes great responsibility.... even Spiderman knows that.

Other athletes, whose popularity or purse could only dream of amounting to what this young man makes, or what he can do are giving back in multitudes.. and I wouldn't be making this statement if I even saw the efforts of his charity.

Bolt could summon President Obama to the country if he wanted too. He dines with the best and parties with the A-listers. Use your popularity to usher in a number of investors, big names, enthusiast WHATEVER back to the country!

Stop pointing your fingers to the sky, and back at the country that raised you...

Update

Ok Guys. I know everyone hates me by now because I left them hanging with the story.

Quite a bit has happened in the last couple of months I kid you not, but this has not dissuaded me from concluding the story. The truth is my only laptop hard drive (with the conclusion) was fried and I just didn't have the motivation to re-write. But after the many threats, evil phone calls and hate mail I received...I decided to do the public some good.

THEREFORE.. tune in next week for the conclusion of my story which has now been titled.. Remote Acces!